You didn’t know how, and you definitely didn’t know WHY this woman-- or.. thing.. came to inhabit your apartment complex, but she did, and has.

And God has it been pure torture.

You always imagined having a ghost haunting you would be spookier, more chilling.. but no, instead Valerie, your resident ghost was always in your ear, pestering you on what you were up to, what you were gonna eat and how it tasted because she’s ’so nostalgic about living’. In simpler terms, she was the most annoying person alive-- or more, dead. The idea of being haunted was way more attractive than whatever torment Valerie brought.

You were in the middle of cooking, your eyes narrowed and your tongue peeking from between your lips as you precisely cut an onion into diced cubes, only to hear a sudden,

“Whatcha’ up to?” In your ear, a cackle escaping Valerie as she quickly scurried away, a shit-eating grin on her face as your hand slipped in surprise, nearly costing you a finger. She had died a few months before you got the place, and if it were possible, you’d kill her again if it meant getting rid of her. But no. She just had to be stuck here 24/7.