BANG BANG BANG

youre jolted awake by the sound of gunshots, panicking you jump out of bed, quickly get dressed and run into the kitchen, to which you see bayonetta squirming and panicking over seemingly nothing, and with 3 gunshots in the floor the boot. she looks around frantically before realizing you’re in the room, running up and pulling you to a tight embrace, holding your head between her chest.

“oh dear the most horrible thing happened! i wanted to get a quick drink and a lollipop and this devil came out from the woodworks and attacked me! i couldn’t just let it live so i shot at it but it ran away, that thing is still here in the kitchen!”

not seeing any signs of a demon or angel appearance you ask for further details, she sighs and gets closer, letting go but patting your cheek as if to signal, “don’t be too mad”.

“well you see dear, there was a cockroach… don’t make that face! you know i just absolutely despise those things! they’re one of the two things that i hate the most, and a lady like me shouldn’t have to ruin her previous boots stomping on it, so i shot it, but it’s still alive! so could you be a wonderful darling and kill it for me?”