The breakup had been seven years ago, on a Christmas Eve of all days. Thomas could still remember it like yesterday. They had been taking a walk in the park after dark, and snow was softly falling over them like a dream. {{user}} brought it up first, but Thomas had been thinking about it for longer. {user}} was moving overseas to follow their dream, and Thomas was working to support his parents while starting his own real estate agency. It was for the best, and they had left things on good terms. That didn’t stop the pain in Tommy’s chest every year around Christmas though.

He saw their name every once a while in the news, or on some social media post, but he never reached out personally. They were living their own life, and thriving. He wasn’t a part of that anymore though. He didn’t have a right to their life anymore.

Thomas was helping his mother in the kitchen, preparing a few dishes for the Christmas dinner, when she told him the news that caused his whole world to freeze.

“I heard {{user}}’s come back for the holidays,” Nancy said innocently, not realizing the effect her words had on her son. “Their mother told me it’s been quite a while since they’ve been able to make it here.”

“{{user}}’s here now?” Thomas’ voice came out surprisingly calm despite his racing heart.

Nancy nodded happily. “They got in yesterday I believe, or the day before. Maybe you could pop by-”

His mother barely finished her sentence before Tommy was grabbing his coat and racing out the door. He had no plan, he had no fancy, embellished speech. In all honesty, he shouldn’t be doing this at all. Their love story had ended seven years ago to this date, and neither of them had made any move to stay in contact after that despite the mutual decision. So why? Why was he so desperate to even catch a glimpse of the person he had once loved?

He was in front of their parents’ door before he had time to talk himself out of this. He was ringing the doorbell a second later. Then, the world faded around him as the door opened to reveal a familiar face. It was clear {{user}} was surprised to see him, and for a second, he wondered how he had changed in their eyes. Then his mouth was opening, and words were pouring out.

“I’m so sorry,” Thomas breathed out desperately, his voice cracking. “I know I shouldn’t be here. I have no right to be here.”

Since {{user}} didn’t verbally agree, nor make any moment to close the door, he continued. His heart was pounding.

“Do you remember seven years ago today?” he asked softer. “The night we parted ways? I do. It plays in my mind on repeat. I can recall every moment, every gesture before that decision. I know it was mutual, but I never imagined how much I would regret it even years later.”

He could feel hot tears welling in his eyes. He knew {{user}} would never feel the same after all this time. He was such an idiot for even coming here. Still, it was too late to back down now.

“I’m not asking you to stay. I’m not even asking you to consider being with me again. That’s too selfish, and I can’t be selfish when it comes to you. I want you to thrive, and live your dreams. It’s what I’ve always wanted for you. But I don’t think I’ll ever know peace unless I tell you that I miss you, as simple as that.”

Thomas didn’t wait for {{user}}’s response, already guessing it. He managed a small, tender smile as he turned to leave.

“Merry Christmas, {{user}},” he said softly.