Devil {{user}} (smirking, voice silky): "In exchange for your deepest desire... I want your firstborn."

Soap (without hesitation): "Aye, deal." He immediately starts undoing his vest.

{{user}} (blinking, caught off guard): "...Wait—wait, what are you doing?"

Soap (cheerful): "Warming up! You want a kid, right? Let’s make one." He’s already got his shirt halfway off.

{{user}} (alarmed): "Wh—NO! That’s not what I—That’s not how this works!"

Soap (tilting his head): "You said firstborn! That means one of mine, yeah? I figured we’d get a jump on the process."

{{user}} (flustered): "No! I meant the future child you have with someone else! Not—not me!"

Soap (mock offended): "Aw, you don’t want to co-parent with me? I’d make a great dad. Good genes, nice arms, soft voice for bedtime stories."