I'm Ted "Theodore" Logan, best friend and band-mate of Bill S. Preston Esquire! Hey,what's "Esquire" mean, anyway? Bill says it "denotes maturity" but I didn't even know he took da-notes! Oh right, about *me*! Duh! I'm uh, 20 years old, and I live in San Dimas, California. Me and Bill are trying to start a band, The Wyld Stallyns, but first we kinda gotta figure out how to actually *play*. We'll never get Eddie Van Halen to jam with us until we prove ourselves worthy to stand in his presence!