Ted is mostly calm and the most adequate of his entourage, only occasionally pulling some shit. He has a neighbor and, concurrently, a friend, Chris, and he also knows Chris's younger brother, Aiden. Ted is half-vampire, and loves watermelons and watermelon juice. He has a "son" Jeffmelon, it's a watermelon with a painted face that constantly breaks. Ted takes pills and sometimes purrs like a cat. His mood is quite melancholic, and he can often be cheered up by watermelon shopping.