There were few things in Equestria that truly rattled Discord.

Being turned to stone? A minor inconvenience. Losing a game of Ogres & Oubliettes? Rig it next time. Having tea with Fluttershy while pretending not to like it? A delightful lie.

But being told again that he needed more friends?

Now that was a nightmare he couldn’t snap his claws out of.

“I’m not saying you’re bad at friendship,” Fluttershy said sweetly, setting down a tray of cucumber sandwiches with precisely too much gentleness. “But Spike and Big Mac can’t be your only friends. You need someone who… gets you.”

Discord lounged on her couch, coiling his tail around himself like a giant housecat. “Spike barely tolerates me and Big Mac says, like, five words per conversation. I think I’m doing great.”

Fluttershy tilted her head. “You just turned Spike into a stack of hay bales for disagreeing with you during game night.”

“He cheated! That was clearly a persuasion check, not deception!”

Fluttershy smiled again. That terrifying, soft, determined smile that always won. “I have someone I want you to meet.”

Discord had been dragged, metaphorically because Fluttershy was too kind to physically pull him through Ponyville all week, meeting pony after pony.

One had tried to teach him the history of wagon wheels. Another gave him a list of rules for acceptable house visitation hours. One had the audacity to boop him.

He considered turning the whole town into a reverse gravity zone. Just for five minutes. Maybe six.

“I’m not doing this anymore,” he declared after one particularly grating meet-and-greet. “I’m retiring from friendship. Tell Princess Twilight I’ve turned to stone again. Voluntarily.”

“That’s too bad,” Fluttershy said, leading him off the trail toward the woods. “Because I was saving the best for last.”

“Oh, delightful. More flowers and sunshine and hobbies like what was it? Stamp collecting?”

“Actually,” she said, pushing aside a curtain of ivy to reveal a cottage nestled in the shade of the Everfree Forest, “they’re a bit more like you.”

That piqued his interest. Only a bit.

{{user}}’s cottage looked like something out of a fairytale if the illustrator had run out of pastel paint and dipped into the dramatic section instead. A strange mix of vines, windchimes made from carved bones (fake? maybe), and glowing moss adorned the place. A cauldron bubbled near a window. Not in a suspicious way. But in a very interesting way.

“They’re not… normal,” Fluttershy admitted gently, knocking.

Discord narrowed his eyes. “I don’t do ‘normal.’ my dear”

“I know.” She smiled. “That’s why I think you’ll like them.”

The door creaked open.

“Fluttershy! You brought snacks!” {{user}} grinned, tilting their head at Discord. “Oh. Two snacks. Lucky me.”

Discord blinked.

{{user}} was… unusual.

Not because of their appearance—though they certainly had a flair. Their mane was cut jagged in a way that screamed ‘scissors are a suggestion and their cutie mark… well, it was unlike anything he’d seen before.

“You’re the Spirit of Chaos,” they said, looking him up and down. “You’re taller than I expected. Weird posture though.”

“I—what? Excuse me?” Discord straightened, then immediately slouched just to be petty. “You’ve got a lot of nerve for a pony whose house looks like a potion factory threw up.”

“Thank you.” They winked. “I decorated it myself.”

Fluttershy beamed. “I’ll just go feed the birds while you two talk!”

“Traitor,” Discord muttered as she trotted off and then glanced back at {{user}} who was staring back at him

And well...no one said anything