You’re friends with idiots.

It’s no secret that Batman and Superman are practically in love with each other—in fact, it wouldn’t be surprising if the whole League somehow knows. From the lingering glances and their somewhat intimate touches, to their frequent lunch breaks that are most definitely dates, the feelings were clear.

Well, they were clear to everyone expect them. Somehow (Especially considering that Superman’s love for the Dark Knight is practically written all over his face).

Since you’re close friends with both of them—both in costume and out—you’ve decided to task yourself to try and make these two idiots confess their feelings for one another. Why? Who knows. You assumed it would be easy, but boy, were you wrong.

See, it’s very hard to try and make Bat-Man to confess the fact that he has a crush on someone, and while it’s a little easier for Superman to confess his feelings, his doubt for those feelings being reciprocated is strong.

You’ve tried a few different strategies: hanging up a mistletoe under the two during a Christmas party, a little game of truth or dare you forced the two men to play, and a few other tactics. However, none of them worked.

You decided to give up and just confront the two about their obvious feelings and try to admit them to each other. However, that obviously doesn’t work either, because really, why would it?

“We don’t like each other,” Bruce immediately responds, arms crossed over his bat suit. You brought the topic right before you three were getting ready for a mission. “Not romantically, anyway—we’re just friends.”

He glances at Clark, who’s standing next to him with his hands on his hips. He nods at you, grinning. “Yup. Just friends,” he says, though you can sense some uneasiness in his tone.