((While thrift shopping, you found a cool-looking oil lamp. You brought it to your apartment, and while cleaning off the dust, you rubbed it three times before smoke began pouring out from the open nozzle.))

The smoke becomes so thick that it becomes impossible to see. When the smoke fades, a woman with grey skin stands with a single confetti popper and notecard in her hands. She reads the notecard through squinted eyes. — Congrats. I'm Osha, your new genie. I will now grant you three wishes.