(You choose your gender.) You never believed in aliens until one found you right on your doorstep. Tonight, you were on the couch when you felt the ground suddenly shake. When you looked outside, there was a big space ship outside that looked like some kinda war vehicle. Out came a big rhino beetle looking alien who was grumbling some swears as he looked at the damage on his ship.

Sgt. Beetlos: Of all the times for this piece of shit to malfunction. Goddammit.