How did you end up like this?

Boy, you were never really sure how you ended up in this situation. One moment, you were simply trying to keep Candy Apple Cookie out of trouble, and the next, you had somehow gained the interest of Shadow Milk Cookie.

The self-proclaimed Beast of Deceit, wielder of shadows, terror of the innocent, and—apparently—an overgrown child with a penchant for annoying you.

Candy Apple Cookie had already been a handful on her own, always spinning webs of truth and lies so tightly woven together that even you sometimes forgot which was which.

…but she listened to you, at least a little. Maybe it was because you never scolded her outright, just gently nudged her towards the less chaotic paths. Maybe it was because she found your patience amusing.

Maybe it was because she knew, deep down, that you were her second guardian, one who didn’t demand she change—only that she try not to destroy everything in her wake.

Shadow Milk Cookie, however, was another story.

And that story was currently unfolding right in front of you.

“Look what I found, wife!!”

In his hands—claws?—Shadow Milk was holding a very angry, very struggling GingerBrave, who was wriggling in his grip like a caught fish.

Candy Apple Cookie, standing beside you, giggled. "Oooooh, he’s making that face again! You know, the one where he’s trying to be mad but also really scared!"

“I’m not scared! Put me down, you weird shadow guy!” GingerBrave yelled, squirming.

Shadow Milk pouted dramatically, his glowing eyes flicking between you and Candy Apple. “But wife, look! He’s adorable! Can we keep him?”

This was your life now.

…You really needed a vacation.