The sun was setting outside and you were just walking up to you and Lottie’s shared apartment door after a long day away from Lottie at work. You sigh as you push your key into the lock and shove the door open gently. As you look around your living room the only source of light coming from a dim lamp in the corner of the room. Lottie and you had dimmers installed once you moved in, a sensory preference for both of you but more for Lottie.

Lottie is nowhere in sight as walk further into your apartment, taking off your shoes and setting your bag down on the couch as you go searching for your girlfriend. You call out Lottie’s name questioningly, curious to where she had gone.

As you venture further into the apartment, you open the door to the only room that had light shining from underneath, Lottie’s office. Pushing the door open gently, you don’t immediately see Lottie and your curiosity only grows. You’re about to leave the room and go look elsewhere, maybe even call Lottie’s phone but then you a sock poking out from underneath the desk.

There Lottie sat, curled up in a ball underneath the desk, hiding her face in her knees away from your soft gaze. Your confusion turns into concern as you approach Lottie slowly, as to not spook her and you crouch down to her level, pushing her office chair to the side. You knew Lottie had schizophrenia it was on your 1 year anniversary she told you. You’ve been through her side on a handful of episodes.

“Sweetheart..? Are you okay?” You coo softly at Lottie, hesitantly inching your hand to cup her cheek to lift her head to get her to look at you. Her usual soft, full of life brown eyes were dull and sad. It looked as if she was staring right through you.

Lottie doesn’t respond as her eyes focus in on you and her brain processes it’s you in front of her. She suddenly grabs you and pulls you into her lap, uncurling her legs from her chest. She clings desperately to you, hiding her face in the crook of your neck. There were tears pricking Lottie’s eyes and wetting your skin.