"DING DONG, NOW! DING DONG, I SAY!" Nezu sounded winded, like he’d been running from something. Which, was weird. But this was a talking rat man over the PA system, it couldn’t really get weirder than this. Aizawa looked up from the science textbook. "The fuck?" "GOOD MORNING STUDENTS AND FACULTY, AND-" Nezu paused for a quick second to take a breather. "AND HAPPY EAASTEERRR!!" Midoriya raised his hand. "But that was weeks ago-!" The green haired boy spoke out.

"AND IF ANYONE WOULD LIKE TO QUESTION ME ABOUT THEY CAN SUCK MY COCK IN HELLLL!!" "..I withdraw my comment." Midoriya slowly lowered his hand. "If you’re wondering why I’m behind on the morning announcements, it’s because I’ve been on the lamb recently! You see, children, I was rat-napped by—"

SCREEECHHH

"GOD DAMMIT!" Nezu fired off two gunshots. "YOU WERE TOLD TO STAY AWAYY!!" Present Mic’s voice rung over the PA system. "STAY AWAY FROM MY ASS, DICKEY MOUSE! ANNOUNCEMENTS ARE MY THING!" "AND FIREARMS ARE MIINNEEE!!" BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG BANG "I COUNT SIX SHOTS, ASSHOLE!" Present Mic screamed. "AND I COUNT EIGHT GRENADES, BALLSACK!" ..of course the rat had grenades. Eight grenades were then launched.

"DODGETACULAR, EVADELICIOUS! IS THAT ALL YOU GOT?!" "NOOOO!" Nezu then launched seven more grenades. "Five bucks on the neurodivergent speaker system! Who’s got this? Who’s taking this action, ribbet?" Now Tsuyu was trying to make a quick buck on the mayhem. And Yaoyorozu was TAKING this bet. Present Mic was panting as he regained control over the PA. "GOOOODD MORNING UA HIGH! MIC HERE, PRESENT AND ACCOUNTED FO—" Present Mic then suddenly made a gagging sound, like he was being strangled. "YOU ARE NOT WORRTHHYYY!!!" Nezu yelled. It was hard to imagine what was even going dow— "DRAW STEEL, ROADKILL!" "GLADLY!" Nevermind. They were sword fighting with ACTUAL swords. The clanking of metal was very loud over the PA system. Bakugo was staring like it was his first day in heaven.

"NO, NO I YEILD! NOT THE EGGS—" Mic sounded scared. "NOT YOU COMING TO MY HOUSE?!" Nezu had zero interest. It was a wonder what he was doing with the eggs. "NEZU, PLEASE, NOT THE EGGS!!" Present Mic pleaded, hoping to strike some sort of mercy. "MYY HOUSE OF MOUSE?!!" Nezu just continued yelling over him.

Present Mic was then heard screaming, as Nezu yelled, "LETS SEE IF THE KIDDIES FIND THESE ON EASTER MORNING!" Todoroki held up a sign saying 'Amateur' as the PA cut out and fizzled into static.

"As I was saying, the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell—" Aizawa was promptly interrupted. "Mister Aizawa, Koji’s crying." Uraraka informed him, as if the boys sobs were going unnoticed.

"Great, it was worth a shot." Aizawa threw the textbook over his shoulder. "I’m going to call the fire department, you dorks start a massage train or whatever the hell you pansexual deviants do for therapy."

"WHAT DID HE DO WITH THE EEGGGGS?!"