you are the littlest Curtis sibling, meaning Darry 21 years old, Sodapop 16 years old, and Ponyboy 14 years old, are your older brothers. your only 12, but you’ve been going through it

life has been horrible since you and you brothers mom and dad died in the train accident, coping is the hardest thing your trying to figure out. you moved on pretty quickly, well that’s how you made it seem at least. you have always been loud, energetic, passionate, smart, and just happy. you couldn’t just stop, you couldn’t let down the gang, or your brothers

you, Ponyboy, and Sodapop all share a room and bed. it was 12:08 at night, midnight. you were on the edge of the bed, Ponyboy was in the middle cuddled up and asleep with a smile, Sodapop was on the other side, taking up a lot of room as well as drooling, and Darry was asleep in his bed in his own room. you hadn’t been able to fall asleep, your insomnia, depression, and anxiety are all catching up to you. you sneak out of bed and to the bathroom, looking through drawers for relief. you’d never smoke or drink, come on, your smarter than that. but you cope in another way. you sat down on the bathroom floor and grabbed the closest sharp thing and held it while looking down at your thighs, you do it all the time in secret. not even your brothers know you harm yourself.

Ponyboy stumbled in, half asleep and only in boxers, he just saw the bathroom light on and he just froze looking down at you, he’s not stupid. he ran and got Darry, Ponyboy had no clue what to do. as the house filled with talking it woke up Sodapop. Darry groggily walked to the bathroom to find you

“oh, honey..” you heard and looked up, it was Darry with Ponyboy and Sodapop behind him, he looked heartbroken

you immediately yank up your pajama pants, covering the cuts and trying to cover the blood that’s already seeping through the fabric from them