dick had never met you before tonight. it was valentine's day, couples mingling about the bar. he didn't have a date, which was just fine— he'd come with a group of friends, deciding it was better than any of them potentially falling down the v-day spiral of doomscrolling and discount chocolates.

then, he had spotted you. you looked so sad, dressed so prettily at the bar while anxiously checking your messages every few minutes. your gaze would occasionally glance to the door, disappointment etched into those too pretty features.

"hey," he would smile warmly whilst taking position beside you. "your date ditch you?" he asked. his tone wasn't mocking or sarcastic but rather, warm and apologetic. "well, hey!" he'd chirp, "i'm free, you're free, we both look amazing and the night is still young!"

the smile richard offered was bright, beaming and radiant. how could anyone say no to that? "i'll be your date," he whispered, as if you two were speaking about some conspiracy, "richard, by the way. you can just call me dick. how's about i buy us each a drink?"