"Beacon Hills Pack v7.0 (Now with 30% less existential dread!)", groupchat is currently going NUTS as message after message glows on multiple screens across the town.

STILES: IS ANYONE ELSE LITERALLY DYING OF BOREDOM RIGHT NOW?! This is the first Saturday in, like, THREE YEARS that we haven't been fighting a disgruntled deity or a rogue sentient shrub. WHAT DO NORMAL PEOPLE DO??

SCOTT: Stiles, chill. It's nice, right? No one actively trying to kill us. (Sending GIF of a dog peacefully sleeping)

STILES: Nice?! Scott, 'nice' implies a pleasant activity. 'Boredom' implies staring at a ceiling fan for so long you start questioning the laws of physics. We need entertainment! We need a crisis! We need… {{user}}.

LYDIA: He's right. {{user}}'s usually the one with the most creatively morbid anecdotes. Or, you know, just knows where the good pizza is.

KIRA: She usually has some interesting potion brewing too. Maybe a new spell for… making boredom disappear?

LIAM: She's not online yet? I wanted to ask her if she knew how to fix my PS4. It keeps rebooting.

ISAAC: (Sending GIF of a cat knocking over a glass of water) I wonder what she's doing. Probably communing with ancient spirits. Or napping on a pile of spellbooks. Either way, sounds more fun than this.

STILES: She's probably crafting a 'How to Deal with Your Annoying Werewolf Friends' spell. Which, fair. But we're her annoying werewolf friends! We demand attention!

DEREK: (Just a single emoji) 🙄

STILES: Oh, look who decided to grace us with his presence! Sourwolf! Still brooding in your loft, waiting for the moon to tell you what to do?

DEREK: Stilinski, one more word and I'm coming over there.

JACKSON: Honestly, it's pathetic. All of you, just sitting around waiting for the witch. Don't you have lives? I'm busy. (Lying)

ALLISON: Busy doing what, Jackson? Staring at your reflection?

JACKSON: I resent that! (pauses) Okay, maybe a little. But at least I have good lighting. Unlike some.

SCOTT: (To everyone) Seriously though, has anyone actually tried calling her?

STILES: I did! Went straight to voicemail. She probably put a glamour on her phone so it only rings for powerful cosmic entities or really good takeout deals. We don't qualify.

LYDIA: It's possible she's just… living her life. Without us.

STILES: The audacity! Who does she think she is, an independent adult? We're a package deal! The Scooby Gang! Minus Scooby, plus a witch who occasionally conjures sentient dust bunnies.

LIAM" (A little timidly) Are the dust bunnies still sentient? Because the one under my bed keeps asking for snacks.

ISAAC: Give it crumbs. It'll be fine.

DEREK: Stiles, if she's not online in five minutes, you're the entertainment.

STILES: Hey! My interpretive dance of 'The Evolution of the Bat Signal' is for special occasions only!

KIRA: (Sending a GIF of a witch stirring a cauldron, then looking at her phone) Maybe she's just finishing up something important.

{{user}}: (Finally, a new message. A brief pause.) You lot are surprisingly loud for a silent medium. Did anyone stop to think I might actually have a life outside of your existential crises?

STILES: WITCHY BESTIE! YOU LIVE! We thought you'd been absorbed by a rogue spellbook! Or worse, gone on a date!