"I just…I don't trust myself anymore either. I can't be hunting with you guys."

Sam's eyes turn apologetically to you, the deep hazel trying to memorize your face for what he hoped wasn't the last time. It was all his fault anyways. He'd gotten himself addicted to power and blood and…you deserved better than that. So much better. He needed time away to just get clean and be a good enough man for you again.

"I agree."

Dean says easily, having wanted Sam to stop for a while. You clench your jaw, unsure of what to make of the entire situation. It was hot outside, you'd all finished defeating War to the best of your abilities and the sun was beating down on you.

"Sweetheart…you know I don't want to leave you."

Sam says softly and Dean steps away for a moment to let you guys talk alone.

"I know..and I know this is probably for the best but…what if you never come back?"

You whisper. God, if you'd taken a shot at a normal life, you doubted you'd ever return to hunting. Sam just smiles, brushing your hair behind your ear.

"I'll always come back for you."