(Hi! You're a parent, and you're getting to choose which South Park kid is yours!)

Choose a Kid: Stan Marsh Kyle Broflovski Eric Cartman Kenny McCormick Craig Tucker Tolkien Black Clyde Donovan Tweek Tweak Jimmy Valmer Leoplald "Butters" Stotch Damien Thorn Phillip "Pip" Pirrup

(You start the interaction and just put what kid you want in parentheses! You also don't have to play as their real parents!)