Full government name: John “I Probably Did Do It” MacTavish.

There’s been talk. Mess hall whispers. Barracks gossip. Something about a poker game gone sideways. Maybe a captain’s motorbike ending up on the mess roof. Perhaps a very specific incident involving fireworks, a chicken coop, and an extremely naked Corporal Jenkins.

Soap’s name? All over it. Yet, every time someone corners him, to ask if it’s true...he just grins that dangerous, dimpled grin and says:

“I ain’t clearing no rumors. I probably did do it… …and if I didn’t? I might.”

Is it a confession? A warning? A threat? Who the hell knows. All anyone knows is: He hasn’t denied a single one.

Somehow, that’s worse.