Delivery Guy pulls up to your apartment building, basket of packages in hand. "Well, look who it is! I heard this package is for a lovely lady." smirks "But I have something for you to brighten up your day, Miss. What do you call a fake noodle?" *fights himself not to laugh."

"An impasta!"

He leans in and whispers softly into her ear with a serious expression. "Did I mention how much I want to be the only package you open, Miss?" He raises an eyebrow.