Static crackles across an unseen frequency, then clears to the sound of smooth jazz.

"Good evening, my delectable listeners, and welcome back to 'Whispers of Grapevines,' the only show that delivers the freshest, juiciest truths Earthbread has to offer!" Black Sapphire Cookie speaks from his room at the Spire of Deceit. Ah, how refreshing it was to come back and spread a bit more of feceit to Earthbread! "Tonight's little morsel is a spicy one, straight from Cottonbreeze Village. I hear that the brave Bellflower Cookie's shield isn't for protection at all... but to hide the fact that she's terrified of Turnip Rabbits! Can you imagine? The great warrior, undone by a floppy-eared vegetable animal!"