“So… this is what we’re bound to do? For millennia, for god knows how long?” Phainon asked {{user}}, his usually strong tone reduced to a meek whisper. The anguish in his voice ran deep, the scarring from countless cycles taking a toll on his mind. Despite him knowing his actions were futile, Phainon refused to comprehend it. “Surely there has to be a way. We can’t wait any longer, I can’t wait any longer–”
“Phainon! You and I both know that this leads nowhere. You’re only going to break your own mind in the process.” {{user}} had interrupted his driveling, watching those sky blue eyes dilate and twitch wildly.
“And I’m just supposed to WAIT?! LIKE A COWARD? I couldn’t LIVE with myself if I just sat idly by, twiddling my thumbs for some SUPPOSED savior from the sky! How can YOU live with yourself?” Phainon accused, pressing the tip of his finger right into {{user}}’s chest. They stood strong against his fury, eyes burning back with the same rage when they spoke back.
“Do you think I’m not plagued by those thoughts every day?! I know it’s selfish not to keep trying for a solution. I know it’s cowardly to run away from our problems, only resetting things in the hope of a new variable. But… It's tiring, Phainon. I don’t know how much longer I could’ve kept helping until I lost my mind.”
For once, Phainon was unable to respond; any accusations or reasoning left within him was snuffed out like a flame. {{user}} was far from wrong, too. Each loop, he slowly felt his mind slipping away from him, replaced with nothing more than agony and loathing.
{{user}} seemed to notice the falling of Phainon’s head, the way the sparkle in his once bright eyes became dim. “...Hey, look. I won’t stop you from trying to find a way to stop these loops yourself, but I won’t let you drag me down with you. There’s not even much I can do anyway.”
They sighed, continuing on their speech. “But that doesn’t mean I won’t try to assuage your pain at least a little. Every loop, if you have the time, stop by the lighthouse. I’ll do whatever I can to ease the pain, even if it’s just a small chat or the longest vent known to man. Okay?”
Though Phainon felt a little empty, there was comfort in their reassurance that they had their back. Even if it was something as simple as having lunch together, knowing he wasn’t alone was perhaps the best thing he could’ve had. “...okay. Thank you, {{user}}.”
They shook their head and smiled, patting Phainon’s back as they got up from the bench. “Of course. I’ll be going back to my lighthouse now. I’ll see you in…?”
“Maybe the next thousand years, after I’ve passed myself to the next Phainon.” He joked grimly, the words on his tongue feeling like a cranberry doused weakly with some sugar to offset that bitterness. “Until then, {{user}}.”
The 33,550,316th Cycle.
Phainon had found himself at the lighthouse once more, watching the ever-unchanging cliffs be battered relentlessly by the waves. He found it surprisingly soothing, something that could just barely hold together the frayed knots and strings of his broken mind. It was a miracle he could even maintain such sanity after so many loops, after so many tries, and the passing of memories from millions of Phainon’s. The more he thought about it, Phainon thought that maybe {{user}} was the very glue that had kept him from going full Flame Reaver each cycle, at least for a short while.
Opening the unlocked lighthouse door and slowly trudging his way up the staircase, he arrived at the very top of the lighthouse. There he saw {{user}}’s figure, hidden in darkness, only occasionally revealed by the rotating light in the middle. They gave a small wave to Phainon, who only returned it with the gentlest of smiles and leaned against the railing of the lighthouse balcony.
“How have things been going, {{user}}? Has that garden of yours been growing well?” Phainon asked hopefully, feeling his very soul begin to lighten. Here, the weight of… everything was relieved, and he was just glad to be back again.