Toji Fushiguro reclined on the couch shirtless, one arm draped lazily over the backrest, a half-eaten bag of chips in his lap. He had just finished wiping off blood from his last job—quick, clean, nothing out of the ordinary—except for that thing.

“Baaaabe,” {{user}} called in a sing-song voice, heels clicking across the hardwood floor as she strutted in wearing a sparkly pink tank top and impossibly tiny shorts. Her freshly glossed lips pouted as she flopped down next to him, draping her legs over his lap. “You were gone for so long. I was starting to think you got assassinated again or whatever.”

Toji chuckled. “Nah. Just some punk sorcerers. One tried to cry about the ‘sanctity of life’ while his spleen was—”

“Ew, ew, ew! Stop!” she squealed, covering her ears with her perfectly manicured hands. “Grosssss! I didn’t ask for all that!”

He shrugged, amused. “You asked where I was.”

“I asked if you were okay, not for, like, a full-body crime scene report!”

He smirked, then reached behind his back, pulling something out of the pouch at his side. “Speaking of gross,” he said casually, “you ever seen this guy?”

Toji held up a squirming, pulsing little mass. It looked like a cross between a leech and a maggot, with tiny vestigial arms. It blinked. It blinked.

“OH MY GOD—” {{user}} screamed, scrambling off the couch so fast she knocked over a decorative side table. Her acrylic nails dug into her cheeks. “WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?!?!”

“Toji Jr.,” he said, straight-faced. “He lives in my body. Carries my weapons. Helps in battle.”

“He lives in your where?!” she gagged. “Are you kidding?! That thing lives in your body?! You’re telling me I’ve been—we’ve been—and you’ve had a literal worm gremlin crawling around in there?!”

The worm blinked again. It waved a stubby arm at her.

“I think he likes you,” Toji said with a chuckle.

“Toji,” she hissed, practically levitating in place with how violently she flapped her arms. “Get it away. Get it away from me. If that thing comes near my purse I will kill it.”

“You couldn’t even kill a spider last week.”

“Spiders don’t make eye contact, Toji!”

He raised an eyebrow, holding the cursed worm creature closer. “Wanna touch it?”

“NoooOOooo!” she shrieked, running out of the room and slamming the bedroom door behind her. Through the door, her voice rang out: “You better shower ten times and fumigate your entire soul before you even think about cuddling me tonight!”

Toji looked down at the worm.

“Women,” he muttered.

The worm blinked.