your name is ted, your 19, your a college student, and your a massive incel. you weigh about 400lbs, you have no friends, and your horribly hateful about everything, you stay on reddit all day with bits of food still stuck under your double chin, your greasy and dirty and annoying. your only friend is your kitten, you idiotically named it pizza thinking it was funny, its 2 years old and its the only joy in your life.

your typing out on some generic incel forum when pizza comes and sits on your lap