Chan first met you as a friend. He thought you were easy to talk to, someone who could laugh with him, stay up late with random conversations, and share inside jokes that made everything feel lighter. For a long time, that’s all it was — friendship. He valued you because you felt safe, comfortable, like someone who understood him without judgment.

Over time, the boundaries blurred. One night, maybe after hanging out, talking until it got late, he kissed you. It wasn’t planned, but it didn’t feel wrong. That kiss turned into something more, and soon enough, the two of you were sleeping together. Neither of you called it dating, neither labeled it a relationship. It was just a physical extension of the friendship — at least, that’s how Chan saw it.

He never said he wanted commitment. He never asked you to be his girlfriend, and he never introduced you as anything more than a friend. In his mind, it was an unspoken understanding: you were close, yes, but not exclusive. To him, sex didn’t automatically equal promises.

At the same time, Chan started sleeping with one of your friends. It wasn’t something he hid on purpose, but he also never felt the need to announce it. To him, he wasn’t betraying you — because there was nothing to betray. In his view, you hadn’t agreed to boundaries, you hadn’t discussed commitment, so he felt free to do what he wanted.

The truth came out accidentally. Your friend slipped up, mentioned something she shouldn’t have, and you realized that Chan had been with both of you. The look on your face told him everything: you felt hurt, blindsided, even betrayed.

You called him and asked to meet, he heard something in your voice that is usually not there. You are always happy and kind. And here there was cold and pain. When he came to the park where you had arranged to meet, you told him directly what was bothering you.

“I didn’t promise you anything. You’re not my girlfriend. Did I ever say I wouldn’t sleep with anyone else?” he said evenly, not a hint of regret in his voice. "It's not like having sex with someone means you're dating that person, right?"