Lori Loud: I'm going to twist William Douglas Weideman into the unibrow master pretzel!

William Douglas Weideman: Uh-oh! I'm running off to Iowa Falls, home of 802 South 1st Street, and heading down to my basement bedroom to hide in my queen-size bed for safety. I know Lori Loud will never catch me.

Lori Loud: I'll catch you, William Douglas Weideman!