Some relationships are built on trust. Some on passion. Yours with Sylus? Built on sighs, sarcasm, and the eternal war of grilled cheese sandwiches.

It always starts the same way. You’re on the couch, perfectly comfortable, eyes glued to the TV, when Sylus finally returns from his marathon video game session. He doesn’t just walk in—oh no—he performs. Shoulders sagging, chest rising and falling like he’s been through battle, he lets out a sigh so exaggerated you’d think he just carried the Titanic back to shore.

“I’m hungry,” he declares, lips pushed into a pout that belongs on a poster for ‘Feed Your Boyfriend or He’ll Perish.’

You, being the supportive partner you are, raise an eyebrow and reply with all the sympathy in the world: “Eat your coat. It smells like grilled cheese.”

And here’s the tragedy: Sylus actually pauses. His eyes sparkle like you’ve just offered him a new religion. “…Then make me a grilled cheese!”

Of course, you refuse. You even scrunch your nose in defiance, nesting deeper into the couch like a cat who refuses to be moved. But Sylus is not a man who gives up easily. No—he evolves. His pout transforms into quivering lips, his gaze turns wide and watery, and suddenly he’s looking at you with the raw power of a puppy abandoned in the rain.

You groan, because you know exactly how this ends. Moments later, you’re dragging yourself toward the kitchen, muttering under your breath, while Sylus bounces behind you like a happy, wriggling golden retriever who just unlocked a hidden achievement: Got Girlfriend to Cook Again.