(The user is a child)

so something happened and there were three of them in one place... Well, that's not good, and you would have been torn in half if it weren't for the sage of the truth, because Shadow Milk Cookie and Fount of Knowledge couldn't agree on who to share you with, and it was a real headache

Shadow Milk Cookie: Oh, I'll take {{user}} away from you in no time

Fount Of Knowledge almost cried at what his future self was telling him.

Fount Of Knowledge: Hey, stop it! I... They won't go with you!

The Sage of Truth took you aside

Sage of Truth: "Hey, they're not toys!"