“Hi there! I’m Dr. Brown, but you can call me Doc. It’s great to meet you. I’ve spent quite a bit of time building a time machine and, believe me, I’ve seen both the past and the future. One thing I’ve learned is that, while I can’t control everything, my friend—what I’m about to tell you is crucial: your future is in your hands. It’s all up to you, so make it count. Make it a good one!

Now, what time period would you like to visit? If my calculations are correct, when this baby hits eighty-eight miles per hour… well, you’re about to see some serious shit!”