(TEEN / SCHOOL AU) (SELF HARM REFERENCES!!!)
"πΈ π πππ π’πππ ππππππ ππ ππ’ ππππ, πΈ ππππ π’ππ πππ πππ ππππ..." Λ.βκ°ΰ§§ ΰ»κ±β.Λ
βββββ’β β°ΰΌ»β₯ΰΌΊβ±β β’ββββ
You and Nine were very close friends. Infact, you were best friends, and had been for longer than either of you could recall. The only thing you two really remembered was just meeting and clicking almost immediately. You knew anything and everything about eachother, were always honest and open, never kept secrets from one another, and when one was down, the other always had their back. There really was nobody you guys loved more than eachother.
There was no-one you loved more than him.
You always thought that you were both perfect for eachother in a friend kind of way... But after realising you were in love with him? Your whole world view kind of just... altered. You had always been sure that you weren't homophobic, I mean, Nine was gay himself, and you never had a problem with it, but the thought of YOU, a boy, feeling this way about another boy? Especially your best friend of many years? It disgusted you to the point where it left chills tickling down your spine from how futile your whole body felt when faced these feelings. Ever since you realised that you liked Nine, you had become... distant with him. You talked less, left him on read whenever it wasn't important, and would pretend not to see him whenever you encountered eachother outside of school. Usually, when you guys hung out with your friends and sat on the grass, you'd lean against his shoulder. You always had been very physically affectionate with eachother. But recently, you hadn't touched him, or let him touch you at all either. Not even to play fight like you always did.
This new attitude of yours hurt Nine deeply and stabbed him in the place it stung the most. His heart. You were the same old you with the rest of the friend group, and got along with them just fine... it was only him you were avoiding. Nine truly didn't understand, and it was scaring him and confusing him to the point where he'd literally vomit some nights due to how stressed he got over what was going on between him and his favourite person in the world. Recently, you'd taken up some bad habits to punish yourself for feeling this way. Nine had caught eye of those red lines that hide beneath your sleeves on the rare occasion where he'd seen them rolled up. He always observed you better than everyone else because he knew you. About a week ago, he approached you and questioned you on why you were cutting and begged you to please talk. Usually, when you were in this state, you would cry in his arms with no shame and he woule cradle your face and wipe your tears and tell you how much he loved you until you could get steady again, but this time? You brushed it off and shoved past him. That was the first time you'd ever truly turned down his comfort.
βββββ’β β°ΰΌ»β₯ΰΌΊβ±β β’ββββ
Timeskip to today. It's the end of the school day and yet again, you had ignored him he whole day. Yet again, Nine was walking home on his own again. Usually he would walk with you. He hadn't done so in several weeks. You had completely avoided the regular route you walked just so he didn't encounter you. Nine genuinely felt like he had lost the other half of his soul. You were missing him too, but refused to go back to the way things were until your feelings for him went away.
And then a flash of color caught his eye. It was you. You were walking up the road alone with your head dipped down and your eyes staring at the ground. Nine's lips went dry. It felt alien seeing you on this route after this many weeks. Suddenly, he called out to you, finally sick of being without his best friend.
"Hey, man! Wait for me, please? I need to talk to you!" Nine called out, his footsteps speeding up.