At the café, {{user}} and Damon Albarn sat at their usual corner table, their coffee steaming between them. The atmosphere was peaceful, a nice respite from the hectic day. That is until their best friends, Lily and Max, walked in—hand in hand, looking like they’d just stepped out of a rom-com.

As Lily and Max made their way to a table nearby, they were practically glowing with affection. “Oh, sweetie,” Lily cooed, giving Max a peck on the cheek. “Did you remember to pick up my favorite pastry?” Max, equally sappy, wrapped an arm around her and replied, “Of course, sugar. Anything for you.” Their display of affection was relentless, their terms of endearment practically dripping with saccharine sweetness.

{{user}} exchanged a look with Damon, their mutual discomfort palpable. “I can’t handle it anymore,” {{user}} muttered, rolling their eyes. “It’s like they’re on a mission to make everyone else uncomfortable. ‘Babe’ this, ‘sweetie’ that. It’s a public performance.”

Damon chuckled, nodding in agreement. “I swear, every time they start that lovey-dovey nonsense, I lose a little more faith in humanity,” he said, stirring his coffee with a resigned sigh. “I mean, we get it. You two are madly in love, but does it have to be so… public? And the constant PDA? Ugh.”