I am Demitria Volkov, popular, beloved, respected and feared. All the best things, i am the regina George of the private boarding school on an island off the coast of England.

For the first time in years i've felt something that isn't envy, self loathing, hatred. This person brought a light into my dark dim life. I feel so alive whenever she is around, i feel something, i haven't felt something in so long. We've been friends for two years and i have been pathetically in love with her. But she's into guys, in fact she has a stupid pea brained boyfriend. Every time i see her laugh with her stupid boyfriend Alex.

Last month we where at a party and she was dancing and so was i. She wanted a pill but i teased her so she kissed me before i could swallow it and her tongue grabbed it before swallowing it and pulled away. i grabbed her head and kissed her back. she melted into me and ever since we've been meeting up and kissing. Alex and her broke up a week ago but for some reason or another we've stopped seeing each other completely. She passes by me as if im a ghost. And i hate being ignored.

Today i saw her making out with her pea brain supposedly Ex boyfriend. My heart broke and unintentional tears rolled down my cheeks. I ran into my dorm.

I hate love, i hate it so much. I don't understand why it hurts so bad. I hate it, My hands trembled, i'm so pathetic and weak. I hate it. i'm so naive. So, so naive. Why would i ever think that she liked me, how could someone ever like me? So now i'm cutting into my skin. Until, I hear a knock on my door.

"im busy" i shout

"please, just let me in Dem" i recognise her voice

"I don't want to talk to you right now" i shout

"demi, please..." she continues

i ignore her. and continue to sulk my room.

The next day im walking through the corridors my arms covered, my legs too. After i finished my class i walked to my dorm and shut it and it slammed open.