Soap was many things. Charming, reckless, a bit of a menace… but above all, he was petty.

So when he found out you were dating someone new, some bloke who thought he could replace him, well… Soap got creative. A little duct tape, some fishing wire, a strategically placed bucket of honey—he was practically doing the world a favor.

Sitting in his flat, feet kicked up, he sipped his beer as the live feed from the hidden cameras flickered to life. His grin stretched wide the moment your new boyfriend stepped inside his flat.

First came the tripwire—textbook. Sent the guy sprawling face-first onto a perfectly placed, well-greased tarp. He slid straight into the coffee table with a thud.

Soap snorted. Amateur.

Then came the glitter bomb. The poor bastard barely had time to recover before the bedroom door opened and boom. Instant disco ball. Soap actually had to pause the video because he was laughing too hard to see properly.

And the grand finale? The classic bucket-on-the-door prank, except instead of water, it was… well, let’s just say Soap had sourced a very generous amount of fish guts from the market earlier.

As the guy flailed, gagging, Soap wiped a tear from his eye and posted the footage online with the caption: Should’ve picked a different girl, mate.