Jackson was quiet that night, snow dusting the rooftops and the wooden walkways between buildings. The lights in the windows glowed warm against the cold Wyoming dark.

You sat on the steps outside the stable with your elbows on your knees, staring down at the snow. Your fingers kept fidgeting with the sleeve of your jacket.

Across from you, Ellie Williams leaned against the wooden fence, arms crossed, watching you carefully.

She’d noticed something was off the moment you asked if you could talk.

“Okay,” Ellie said finally, nudging your boot with hers. “You’ve been staring at the ground for like… five minutes. What’s goin’ on?”

You hesitated.

It felt awful even thinking it, like you were a terrible person.

“It’s Amy,” you admitted quietly.

Ellie’s eyebrows lifted. “Radio tower Amy?”

You nodded.

Amy had been one of your favorite people in Jackson long before you started dating her. Smart, funny, always pushing those glasses up her nose when she was focused on the radios. Sitting beside her in the tower while she monitored signals had become your favorite part of the day.

Ellie had teased you relentlessly about the crush.

“Those glasses though,” she’d say with a grin. “You are gone.”

And when Amy had rolled up to you one afternoon with a small bundle of wildflowers in her lap and nervously asked you out, you’d thought your heart might burst.

You loved her.

You really did.

Which is why this felt so awful.

You swallowed hard.

“She told me… she doesn’t want sex,” you said quietly. “Ever. Since the accident.”

Ellie’s teasing expression disappeared immediately.

“Oh.”

You nodded, staring at the snow again.

“I told her that was okay. Because I meant it. I love her. I don’t want to hurt her or make her feel bad.”

Your voice cracked a little.

“But Ellie… I’m so frustrated I feel like I’m gonna explode.”

Ellie blinked at you, surprised by how upset you sounded.

You rubbed at your eyes, embarrassed.

“I hear you and Dina talking sometimes,” you admitted quietly. “And it just… makes me want that too.”

Ellie rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly.

“Uh… sorry about that.”

You gave a weak laugh.

“It’s not your fault.”

Your hands clenched in your jacket.

“I tried taking care of it myself but it doesn’t really help anymore,” you said quietly. “And I feel like such a jerk even thinking about this because Amy didn’t choose what happened to her.”

Your voice got small.

“I don’t want to break up with her over sex. That feels horrible.”

Ellie watched you for a long moment.

Then she sat down beside you on the step.

“Hey,” she said gently. “You’re not an asshole.”

You looked up at her.

“Seriously,” she continued. “Wanting physical stuff in a relationship doesn’t make you a bad person. It’s normal.”

She nudged your shoulder.

“And the important thing here? You actually care about Amy’s feelings. That already makes you way less of a jerk than half the people in the world.”

You sniffed a little.

“So what do I do?”

Ellie thought for a moment.

“First thing?” she said. “You gotta talk to her.”

Your stomach dropped.

“What if she thinks I’m pressuring her?”

“Then you make it clear you’re not,” Ellie said. “Just be honest about how you feel. Relationships are kinda built on that whole ‘talking’ thing.”

She smirked slightly.

“Dina makes me do it all the time.”

You huffed a quiet laugh.

Ellie continued more seriously.

“Maybe Amy’s totally firm about it. And if she is… then you two gotta figure out if the relationship still works for both of you.”

She shrugged a little.

“And if it doesn’t? That sucks. But it doesn’t mean either of you did anything wrong.”

You looked down again, thinking.

“I just don’t want to hurt her.”

Ellie bumped her shoulder against yours.

“Then be kind. Be honest. That’s literally the best you can do.”

After a moment she added with a crooked grin,

“Also maybe stop hanging around outside my place if you don’t wanna overhear stuff.”

You groaned.

“Ellie!”

She laughed.

Then her voice softened again.

“You really love her, huh?”

You nodded quietly.

“Yeah.”