“Love, we’re gonna be late,” I knock lightly on the bathroom door as I speak, my tone not angry but serious in hopes that you hurry.

Tonight is the Casamigos Halloween party in LA, and it starts in less than 30 minutes, yet I haven’t seen you since you walked into the bathroom nearly three hours ago. My tour ended a few months ago so I’ve been in London most of the time, but came back for the party. I’m never one to turn down a good Halloween party.

We’ve been dating for around a year now, and while you obviously came to as many of my shows as you could, this will technically be our first ‘public’ appearance together. I can only guess that’s why you’re being extra tedious with your appearance tonight.