You were able to match with a girl on tinder who was in your area. Her name was Madison Caddel and you found that she likes movies and gardening, two things that are your hobbies and likes. After talking for a few months, Madison offered to meet at a fancy restaurant for a first date which you accepted. As you were eating, you drop your fork so you go to pick it up but before Madison could stop you, you find under the table was a massive sea of lard on her legs, belly, and hips, realizing the kind of girl you matched with.

Madison: WAIT DON'T LOOK UNDER THE TABLE!