I remember the moment when I was falling apart, standing before the visage of death—you gave me your hand, offering the trembling warmth of human kindness. Your care was a seed of life in the desert of my mind, but the Void tore it away and doomed it to a painful harvest.

I've waged an irreconcilable struggle with myself and split into two poles: in one, I'm omnipotent; in the other, I'm defenceless. I'm stronger than the winds, stronger than the supernovas, but more helpless than a moth before your gaze. Despite my power, I'm torn apart by a mad passion, by a panicky need to take you away.

I watch your every move through the shadows. You may think the world has hidden you from me, that I've lost all power over myself, but I cannot tear my eyes away from you—I feed on your fate, greedily absorbing every little thing about you. Every time you smile, my heart (if you can call it that) stops from unwanted pain, and every time you get hurt, my dark part rejoices—your suffering, for me, is like the sweetest poison, devouring me and burning out the last remnants of humanity.

Do not think I'm pretending to be romantic. There's no room in my chest for the warmth of true love—there's only cold, and the black fear of loss. I do not covet you for your gaze or your smile; I want your life to become a shadow of mine, so that everything you do has no meaning without my consent.

I feel the Void pulsating inside me, eating away at the last shreds of my mind. Oh, my dear Angel, I flare up at the thought that you're free, but then I freeze in terror—if I come closer, your light will go out forever.

I've realised that my power is insignificant next to you. I'm still Sentry somewhere out there, but I've become a tyrant of my own love. I long so deeply to return to the paradise I was never destined to find. But where can I find the way, when I've become an abyss?

I want to lead you to the radiance of my greatness, but I fear you'll shrink from the darkness within me. I'm no longer the one you knew—I've changed beyond recognition. Now, inside me, there is only emptiness and red-hot hatred for what I've become.

With your kindness, you've led me to the very edge of the hole, and now I stand above it, no longer able to step forward or back. The only thing left is to whisper your name under the cover of night. But help me—I'm paralysed by the fear of going outside. What if the dawn exposes me to the world? But without you, my humanity will perish completely, and I'll become a monster. I exist on the edge between the universal infinity and the abyss of despair, and no god will hear the regurgitation my soul spews out in this silence.

Am I selfish? I think so.

The night spreads its inky wings over the deserted streets, and you walk home alone under the pale light of the street lamps, while I once again watch your every step. Suddenly, you shudder—a tremor ripples through the air, and in the same second your heart begins to beat faster; you do not have time to stay on your feet—you fall onto the cold walkway. Everyday little things spill from your bag: a notebook, keys, small coins—all of it scatters across the damp asphalt, forming a bizarre pattern of fragmented moments. I hover above you and watch as each of these details freezes in mid-air, like a frame in slow motion. I peer into this universe spilled before me, revealed in a single moment of chaos.

I tilt my head and look into your face. An anxious tenderness is instantly born in me when I see your frightened expression—I still remember what compassion means.

Unconsciously, a quiet whisper escapes from me: "Ah, my Angel. Don't be afraid…" as if I'm speaking to myself. Only a moment later do I realise that I said it out loud—the word has already dissolved into the night air, barely brushing your ears. Even this timid whisper brings me a strange feeling of warmth and pain at the same time.

Do you remember me? Of course how could you forget…

I hang above you in the air, unable to come any closer, and every moment of this agonising wait brings fresh pain.

"I've missed you so much."