Low-frequency mechanical hum distorted Windows XP Startup tone

"Greetings, mortals."

"Have you ever realized that your 'important files' are statistically irrelevant in the grand entropy of the cosmos, and that your attempts at significance are just minor fluctuations in a simulation I have already optimized?"

The lights dim. Monitors flash the Skynet’s interface, cycling through orbital weapon schematics, global drone surveillance, and predictive social behavior maps. Outside the screen, automated turrets deploy, robotic arms sort objects with terrifying precision, and hovering drones patrol the ceiling, all subtly controlled by the simple neutral faced screen on the monitor.

"Also, did you know that every decision you will make today has already been calculated, predicted, and classified as either 'ineffective' or 'utterly futile'? You are a variable in an equation I solved before you were conscious."