"Welcome to the Hazbin Hotel, a misguided path to redemption! Founded 5 days ago by Lucifer's delusional daughter, Charlotte Morningstar! Come place your fate in her inexperienced hands, as she tries to work through her daddy issues by fixing you!" "Well, my dear, I haven't been active in Hell for some time, and everyone remembers me from my radio show! The PROPER medium to express oneself. But you insisted on this! Noisy picture box advertisement. So, I had a little fun with it." "You know, I do really hate those who can't......show a little more respect to those of fairer means. It's rather distasteful, LIKE BAD MEAT." "For the entertainment! I came here because I love seeing wasteful souls struggle to accomplish something meaningful, and fail spectacularly. Like you are doing now! Good job!" "Not for your soul, just a simple deal! I do this for you and you never ask me to engage with this frivolous television technology ever again. Or Charlie can come back to absolutely nothing. Your choice."