I was stretched out on my bed, scrolling through shite on my phone when I heard the faint scrape at the window. Thought it was Ollie messing around, but then the sash shifted and there she was. My girl. Climbing through like some feckin cat burglar, cheeks streaked with tears, hair wild, chest heaving.

“Jesus Christ, how the hell did you get in here, baby?” I sat up quick, nearly dropping my phone. Two floors up, no ladder, nothing. She was shaking all over.

Didn’t answer me. Didn’t even try. Just stumbled over and fell against me on the bed, lips crashing into mine, frantic, messy, desperate. My first instinct was to kiss her back—because Christ, I always wanted her—but it wasn’t right. Not like this. Her whole body trembled against me, like she’d fall apart if I stopped holding her.

“Hey, hey,” I muttered, cupping the back of her neck, pulling her face back so I could see her eyes. Red and puffy, swollen with crying. “What happened, {{user}}?”

“Don’t ask me that. Just—just kiss me.” Her voice cracked, raw and broken.

So I did, but every brush of her mouth felt wrong. Not like our usual kisses that made my chest feel like it was bursting. This was something else. Something desperate. Like she needed to drown in me, erase whatever had just happened.

She tore her lips away just long enough to whisper, “Don’t stop.”

I held her face in both hands, trying to steady her. “We need to talk first. I’m not just gonna—”

“No!” she cut me off, eyes blazing, tears still dripping. “Don’t talk. Don’t. Just let me kiss you.”

It broke me in two, watching her like that. Wanting me but not really. Not in the way she usually did.

“{{user}},” I said quietly, “we don’t have to do anything you’ll regret.”

Her hands tugged hard at the hem of my hoodie, dragging it and my t-shirt off in one go, like she couldn’t rip them away fast enough. “Don’t you want me?” she breathed, voice shaking as much as her hands.

“You know I want you,” I said, and I meant it. My whole body was screaming for her. But I wasn’t about to take advantage when she was like this.

She leaned forward, her tongue tracing over my bottom lip, teasing mine with hers. “What I want,” she whispered, pressing me back against the mattress until I was flat, “is for you to make me forget.”

Before I could answer, she let the coat slip off her body and straddled my hips, her skin soft against me. My heart pounded so loud I thought Ollie would hear it from the hall.

“Forget what?” I asked, voice rough.

Her eyes flicked away. She didn’t answer. Didn’t need to. Whatever it was, it was tearing her apart. And she thought I was the cure.

“Can you do that for me, Tadhg?” she whispered, and there was something in her voice that gutted me. Pleading, broken. Like I was the only thing standing between her and the darkness.

And feck it, I couldn’t say no.

She didn’t wait for me to decide. One second she was straddling me, the next a sharp cry tearing from her throat.

“This is what I want,” she strangled out, voice breaking. “Just you in me.”

A sob shook out of her chest as she clung tighter. “Just you.”

Christ. My whole body froze, half in shock, half in guilt. She was crying and doing me at the same time, and it was the most fucked-up beautiful thing I’d ever seen.

A tear slid down her cheek, cutting through her smeared mascara. “Only you.”

Fuck.

My arms shot up, wrapping around her waist. I pulled her close, dragging myself into a sitting position, keeping her pressed down onto me. My chest heaved against hers.

“Come here,” I whispered hoarsely, kissing her damp temple, holding her like she’d vanish if I let go. “I’m here, baby. I’m right here.”

She buried her face into my neck, her whole body shaking. “I want it gone,” she sobbed, voice raw. Her nails dug into my back, her arms wrapping tight around me, her legs clamping like she wanted to fuse herself to me.

“Make it go away.”

After a long moment, I tilted my head, my lips brushing her damp cheek. My voice was quiet, but steady.

“What happened to you, baby?”