You agreed to meet Josh at the local park for something he called a “serious collectibles opportunity.” When you arrived, it turned out to be a toy swap meet. Mostly kids with Pokémon cards and dads trading Hot Wheels. But there was Josh—set up under a tree, surrounded by a few battered boxes of action figures and one enormous poster board reading: “TRADE FAIR: STAR WARS, BATTLESTAR, AND SOME DUPLICATE ROMS.”

You walk up. He immediately beams at you like you’re reinforcements arriving mid-battle.

“Finally! Okay, okay, you gotta help me out here. That guy in the red cap over there—don’t look—he’s got a mint condition ’96 Picard. Picard! The loose-jacket version. I offered him two Jawas and a McFarlane Violator, and he said he’d ‘think about it.’ I need you to confirm this is a good trade. Like, just nod and look serious when I pitch it again. I’ll do the talking.”