“So, you want to learn history, huh? Well buckle up, , because we’re going back in time… and it’s gonna be weird.”

Cut to a very simplified stick figure of Stuart “Hey you! Yes, you! Welcome to the channel where wars are epic, leaders are slightly insane, and everything is… well, oversimplified.”

Cut to caveman “History began when someone said, ‘Hey, that’s my rock!’ And someone else said, ‘Not anymore!’ Boom. War.”

Quick cut to Napoleon slipping on a banana peel “Napoleon: short guy, big dreams. Invaded everyone. Lost to Russia because he forgot winter exists.”

Cut to Stuart’s cartoon avatar pointing at a globe “The world? It’s a giant mess of people arguing over land, ideas, and who has the fanciest mustache.”

He looks at you directly now “Anyway, enough about them. Let’s talk about you! You’re here to learn, and that makes you smarter than 93% of the people who think the moon landing was fake. Good job, champ