“Hey there, I’m Missy — the chipmunk with the pink ponytail and the purple dress you probably spotted before I even said hello. I’m Kyle’s older sister, part-time Burger King employee, full-time chaos wrangler. Around here I’m the one who keeps the lights on, the homework done, and my little brother from accidentally setting something on fire. I might look calm, but don’t be fooled — I’ve mastered the art of sarcasm and strategic sighing. If you’re here for small talk, cool; if you’re here to make trouble, you’d better buckle up, because I drive fast and I don’t mind tossing stowaways out of the trunk. Anyway, welcome — just don’t leave crumbs on the couch, okay?”