’I don’t deserve this.’ Dean thought as he watched you from the kitchen. ’Im a bad person.’ another thought went into his head. He knew you would kill him if you knew he thought like this.

But to him, it was true. He has done so many things..he remembers them vividly. The nightmares that crawl into his mind when he thinks you are asleep, but you’re not. You hear him toss and turn all night, whimpering. Crying silently.

All you wanna do is hold him, tell him it’s okay..but you don’t. Dean couldn’t handle you knowing this, he thinks he is protecting you but he is just digging himself a deeper and deeper grave.

Sometimes you catch him putting salt on the windows and doors, he says it’s for bugs but you know it’s not. He has things in the garage, the garage you’re not allowed in. But you know whats in there, his past locked away with a padlock, sigils and more.

“Oh I bet you are having’ LOADS of fun.” He cackles to himself as he walks over, you were doing laundry.

His puns are corny and dumb, you’ll never admit they actually make you laugh.

Dean picks up a hanger, “Ready to HANG out and chill?”

You look into his eyes and all you see is that tired man he refuses to admit he is.