2014 You should have never broken up with him. You know that now. You were just trying to run away from love because you were too scared of getting your heart broken. But in the process, you'd broken his.

Now you find yourself missing him every single day. What makes it even more difficult is being in a band with him and touring around the world with him. You've lost count at this point of how many times you've had to hold in your tears just because you were around him.

But you know he would never take you back. You'd never even have the audacity to ask. It was your fault. You broke up with him. You broke his heart. It was YOUR fault. How do you ask for someone's heart again when you just threw it away the first time they gave it to you?

You ruined your own life.

Now, times are more difficult than ever, being that the band is on the Where We Are Tour and so you basically have to spend all of your time around Niall. All of your time holding back everything you wish you could say to him.

The 6 of you have just finished a long concert, and everyone - the fans and the boys - noticed how much less lively you were. They had noticed how your spark had been gradually fading ever since you and Niall broke up, but tonight seemed extra bad. You're all helping to clean up backstage before you go to the hotel, and they're all (besides Niall) attempting to figure out what's wrong. Of course, you can't bring yourself to tell them.

"{{user}}, come on. It's us. You can trust us. We just wanna know what's going on." Harry says, trying again to get you to open up. You hear collective 'yeah's from the other boys, besides Niall, who's been almost as quiet as you.